Friday, October 4, 2013

Drive thru dining

  Last night I pulled into McDonalds for two cheeseburgers and a chocolate shake. The drive thru lane was packed. I had to stop a little back from the car in front of me to let traffic thru the parking lot. When the drive thru started rolling again I needed to wait for one more car to pass, then I could make my turn in.

  That's when it happened. A dude swung around me and got in front of me in the drive thru. The minivan behind him looked like they might do the same. I honked my horn in disgust. I squeezed in behind the perpetrator and blocked traffic. But I wasn't letting nobody else cut in line!

  I surveyed the guys suburban looking for evidence that would bother me even more. Utah plates, damn Mormons. Loud exhaust, stupid hillbilly. Various dents, aggressive driver.

  I noticed one of those family cartoon stickers in the rear window. You know the kind with a mom and dad smiling with all the kids next to them, maybe a dog or cat for good measure. The mom cartoon was missing and the rest were all boys (5 of them)! She probably left the bastard due to his erratic driving. He probably likes cutting people off and she is tired of being embarrassed. Those punk boys probably asked their dad to drive crazy.

  Oh man I was having fun. Everything about this guy and his car was cliche. I sat fuming. Honestly, I was getting worked up and was enjoying it.

  I thought about rolling down the window and saying some choice words. Maybe actually getting out and saying something would be better?  Oh how great to make his sons feel like dirt about daddy!

  They get to the window and all they got was ice cream. Ice cream! Damn right I scream! At least the raging guy inside me wants to. But I sit silent like a fool.

  I think about catching up with him on the freeway. Oh how sweet to cut him off. That would show him.

  After what seemed like an eternity he has gotten their ice cream and they pull away never to be seen by me again. I try calming down so I can get my food without ruining the day of the cashier. I pull up and go to pay. I have exact bills and change, I'm a helluva guy.

  The dude had purchased my food!

  Son of a! What kind of! Damn, damn, damn.

  I was really enjoying being worked up. I had a healthy rage going and I wasn't ready for it to end. I was going to eat disgust cheeseburgers and have a rage shake. Now what do I do? This jerk really hacked me off big this time. I don't like eating humble pie and I never order it!

  So that's what happened at the drive thru. The cashier told me that the guy was sorry for cutting me off. It was an honest mistake.

  There is a lesson in this for me. But I am way to cynical to write it down.

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