Listening to "The Mental Illness Happy Hour" podcast and I got quite a revelation. When we are broken or in distress we often think that if we accomplish something our trouble will be over. Its like we assume success negates hurt. While success is often a good thing, with regards to emotional trauma it doesn't have a direct correlation to healing.
That is not easy for me to accept. But I believe it to be true.
The reason I struggle with applying this into my life is that I like solving problems. If you talk to me about your struggle I instantly switch to solving mode. The tender, just listen and be there, side doesn't come thru as quick.
Just knowing that someone is there to share the pain is transformative.
The inverse would be laughter. Laughter is commonly a public thing. We laugh more and harder with someone rather than alone. We love sharing joy.
I never try to fix anything about someone when they are laughing. Instead I try and get closer to them. Maybe have a good moment.
Why do I think happy moments are good and sad ones aren't?
I hope the next person who comes to me broken, AND wants me to help solve there problem, isn't taken aback when I just want to comfort them and talk. Ok, maybe I will help! Friendships are so messy!
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