Michael

  Michael wasn't a friend, he was barely an acquaintance, what he was was the younger (annoying) brother of my highschool girlfriend. As I entered into my junior year of highschool he was a freshman. We sort of had the same friends and we did kinda hangout. But he was always the annoying little brother.

  His wife found his body Monday morning. Suicide.

  Twenty two years of never seeing him, or thinking about him, and yet I can't imagine this ever happening. Its tragic. Why this? Why now?

  How will his wife be able to cope and grow? What trauma does this do to the kids? Will they navigate the murky waters of recovery successfully? Can some good come out of this?

  I have compassionate thoughts for his family. I grief for his family. Somehow, somebody please go help.

  Somehow I find within myself a tiny sense of relief. I know its messed up in a dark way, but finding out that I'm not the only one who went down the road of destruction brings an eerie comfort. Listen closely, I am not at all happy with their trauma. It is just that I didn't know people had problems, at least more than superficial problems. I felt alone in a world of normal people, this helps change that.

  I want to be careful. I have no idea if he was plagued by mental issues, addictions, or any such thing. I just wish I had a crystal ball that I could have seen the future and gotten help. I wish I somehow could have known the pain of life and been more helpful...sooner.

  So I take a moment to think about Michael. I have no clue how he got to such despair. Frankly, I don't care how he got there. My heart breaks for him and his family. Such pain and sorrow.