Preaching

  Last night I had a very vivid dream about preaching. I will share about yesterdays activities that led up to the dream, then share the gory details.

  I listen to a great podcast called "Key Life". Steve Brown, the host, shares lots of good insight into loving one another. His focus is mainly teaching Christians to set aside the issues that are secondary and love each other primary. This is far easier said than done!

  Steve spoke about teaching at a very "conservative" conference. His job was to preach three or four times. Before he got to preaching someone caught him smoking his pipe. They really thought about kicking him out, not letting him preach, they may have even doubted his salvation. After scolding him not to smoke, they let him teach, but if he smoked again he gets the boot. He complied and did the teaching.

  The last time Steve was speaking he figured he better leave it all on the line. Why get the boot for a small thing like smoking? He unloaded the full arsenal. So, midway thru his teaching he stopped. He asked the audience if he could just speak plainly for a while.

  Steve shared how his grandfather had commited suicide. How his father abandoned him. How, at 14, he had to confront his fathers mistress. Then he spoke how God's grace led him out of all that destruction and loved him the way he needed.

  The silence was only broken by the tears. A man came up to him and shared about how his father had commited suicide, the man had never shared that before! Many other people approached him with their hurts and he was able to share God's comfort. He spent the rest of the weekend helping others get over their pain. Suicide vs smoking, I think he chose wisely!

  Then last night I got to see Chaplin Gordon at the truckstop in Troutdale, Oregon. We debated the usual stuff (predestination, baptism, bibles, all the "good stuff"). Suddenly the conversation shifted. He spoke about John chapter 17, the Lord's prayer. Not the prayer Jesus gave as an exsample, rather the actual prayer Jesus spoke. In that prayer Jesus says in verse 21 that He prays for us "that they all may be one" and further in verse 23, "I in them, and thou in me, that they may be made perfect in one; and that the world may know that thou hast sent me, and hast loved them, as thou hast loved me".

  Gordon and I went on to talk about the need for brotherly love. Gordon is fundamental baptist by all counts, yet he loves his brothers and chooses to have fellowship with them, even if they disagree on secondary stuff.

  My mind was primed. I had been filled with great information. I hit the pillow thanking God for such a great day filled with great teaching, from two different sources no less! Then I dreamed, oh boy did I ever!

  I was in a huge by large assembly of Bible believing baptists. The preacher wasn't to be found. People knew Gordon and asked him to speak. I told Gordon that I wanted to speak if I had the chance. He said sure and taught for a while. Then came my turn.

  I approached the pulpit. It was skinny, solid wood, and well worn on the edges. The stage was ampitheater style with the audience almost circling all the way around. I asked God if I could share my story. Placing my hands on the pulpit, I opened my mouth and.... my alarm went off. Woke up by that infernal beeping!

  I have been given the priviledge to preach a few times in my life. I was always concerned with looking good or teaching just the right words. Never, I mean it, never did I try and share what God had showed me. I never talked about the trauma of growing up. I never spoke of my addictions.

  I hope God gives me the opportunity to share the truth. I really love preaching, I am not uncomfortable speaking in front of people. The only thing I am scared of preaching is falling back into the trap of being an impersonal preacher. Hiding my past while preaching is like pretending God saved a perfect man. I am not a perfect man and I shouldn't try to hide it.