Running to win

  I like Paul's comparison of living for God to that of running a race to win. We all imagine approaching the end of our life and hearing God compliment us on what we have done. Well, at least we want to imagine it that way! 

  I have a little history with running. It started in highschool running cross country for Riverside Christian High. I have many fun memories of running on the team, but perhaps the most memorable was the first "Cross country meet".

  It was held in Hesperia. Hesperia was a high desert city, very dry, and awfully hot. The course was about three miles long (as all cross country styles are). The course went thru a series of ravines, turned right, went up a hill, thru a sandtrap, back down the hill, across the ravines, and finally done.

  We psyched ourselves up. I had no real experience with running so far. I had only been to a couple of practices. There were quite a few schools represented their, so many that they had to stagger the starts. My team was on the second or third start.

  And we were off! Jason (our teams indian super-runner) blasted forward to an early lead. I valiantly fought my way to the back of the pack.

  We turned and headed up the hill. Still we were all running in a pack. Then the sand. It was as if all energy I thought I had was sucked right out of me. The sand pit was huge and I could see the leaders starting to head back down the hill. I began to walk.

  My friend Jimmy started to walk also. We comforted each other on our failings and walked together. We would jog for a while, get winded, and walk again. Finally we made it back down the hill. All that remained was the few ups and downs of the ravines.

  We could start making out the finish line. Behind us we saw the next races runners coming down from the sand trap. Panic set in. What if we finished after the next group of runners? This could not happen!

  Jimmy and I started running. As we got closer to the finish, I became aware we were racing to see who would be last. We had come to an agreement before that we would try and tie, but now that was thrown out. We were really racing!

  When we came up on the finish the people stretched a ribbon across for us to run thru. How very nice! We blasted our way thru to the cheers of the crowd. I don't know who won.

  Then it all became clear. They thought we were the first to finish in the next race! The people who actually finished first had been robbed of their glorious finish by us!

  I guess we should have given back the ribbons for first and second place.

  Okay, I am just kidding! We sheepishly told the event staff what had happened. They made no big deal about it.

  Running to win is what I try to do now. If I must pass out in the sand pits of life, I will continue pressing on to the glory of God. No first place in the second race will do.

You are so dreamy

  As dreams go, this one was extreemly realistic. It involved a picnic and family reunion. There was the normal confusion that comes when dreaming but there was three very poiniant things.

  The first was a house I came across while shopping at yard sales. This yard sale seemed normal at first, but I began to notice some very familiar things. There were pictures of my family from years gone by. Aunts, uncles, grandparents, and other extended family. That's when I began to notice the contents of the sale, everything was in perfect condition and everything belonged to someone in my family. Toys, tools, photos, it was all there. I ran and got my family and they came and looked. The thing that stands out in my mind was a purple bike with chrome trimmings. The bike looked like it was from the 1950's.

  Next came a bike ride. Nobody had the purple bike. Everyone was going to ride into town, get some lunch, and shop at the downtown stores. Somehow it took me a while to get back to the picnic area and when I arrived someone else was riding my bike and everyone was gone. I was left behind.

  This began the third thing. I had some friends and my wife try and explain why I couldn't go on the ride (why weren't they on the ride? Dreams!). Whatever they said made sense to them, not me. It seems that there was not enough bikes and I was the logical choice to leave out. I asked if anybody seemed sad that I couldn't go. This question upset my wife.

  I don't have the ability to write down all the nuances of my dream. It had great volumes of information. Moments that I felt terror and others where I felt loneliness. Many people talked with me. I was unable to process what was said.

  Dreams aren't reliable as a source of information. We can understand a little about issues in our life, but only a little. God can inspire dreams, I don't think He inspired this one. That being said, let me try and interpret this dream a little. Oh boy what fun!

  The house full of memories was my way of imagining my families past. It was so cool seeing all the toys of my distant relatives.

  The bike ride was a picture of this Christmas. I was unable to be around for Christmas and it emerged in a dream.

  I left something out of the last part. My wife and I went on a long walk. Oh boy was she upset! She was incredulous as to why I didn't understand about the bike ride. I just couldn't get it. I've never seen her so mad! I think this part deals with my fear of being unaware of others feelings. That's my guess anyways.

  Dear friend, dreams can't always be trusted. They are at best figures of issues we face. When a dream has as much information as this one did it freaks me out. Most dreams are stored in short term memory and they fade fast after I awaken. This one has staying power. It exposes my fears and hopes.

  It would be cool to find a house of memories tho!

 

Merry Christmas

  I am looking out at a landscape lightly dusted by snow. The hustle and bustle of the season seems to have taken a lull.

People are perhaps in church singing familiar carols. They are expressing what God gave them that first Christmas so long ago.

  Families are preparing for a meal. They are hoping old arguments (or new ones) won't be visiting this year.

  Loners and outcasts are wondering what happened to all the Christmas joy they heard so much about. They wonder just how this season should actually work. Perhaps they are bitter. Most likely they are hurting. 

  For me, this is a very special Christmas. God has sewn up my broken heart. There are many things I wish I could do today, yet God has given me great things I can do.

  I approach today full of strength. Oh no, my friend, not mine by Gods. I am on this journey of life knowing that my GPS works perfect (Gods Provisioning Spirit). I shall not get lost.

  Joseph and Mary began their journey to Bethlehem with great valor and courage. They had been asked of God to set apart their lives and bring The Saviour into the word. No small task to be sure.

  Amid the birthing scene were plenty of dumb beasts. It was a stable after all. I am happy to proclaim that I am also a dumb beast that marvels at God coming into human life. Praise God!

  Amazingly God has sent shepards into my life, just as he sent them to Mary and Joseph. They had heard the message of salvation and brought it to me. Destitute of anything good in my life Jesus has brought joy and peace into this wretched sinner.

  So, why do I wish you a merry Christmas? Because God desired me one. Celebrate this Christmas! 

The Plinth

  Christmas is upon us (sneaks up quickly, huh). The sights, sounds, and memories surround us this very special time of year. As Christians, we place very special meanings on everything we do for the holiday.

  Without lights, eggnog, decorations, a tree, presents, or anything we would recognize as "Christmas", The Lord Jesus stepped into human form as a baby. He took upon himself this humanity so that he could purchase our freedom. Fully man and fully God, Jesus came into the world and we celebrate that fact.

  Oh sure, we get lost in the hustle and bustle of the season. Zooming thru stores we seldom remember why in fact we are there. We don't often think about sharing our rejoicing, we get mired in the process of giving. Bah humbug. On the other hand, sometimes life is really rough at Christmas and we have pain, unspeakable pain.

  How then, O Lord, shall we rejoice in the midst of our lifes turmoils? He answers gently, "Cast your cares upon me".

  We must lay hold upon the precious gift ,take this season and its burdens, and give gifts like God gave his gift.

  And Rejoice! When we sing or dance during this season let it be fervently. Let the love from above produce in us great joy. Eric Ludy said, "Don't pray that you will have joy, rather pray that the God of Joy will fill you. Don't pray that you will have peace, pray that the God of peace will fill you!"  We don't seek an artificial joy and peace, we want the real thing.

  The Prince of Peace came into our world! Humbly, as a baby, he arrived. Perfect love he carries. All joy is in his arms. 

So:
Decorate for Jesus,
Give gifts for Jesus,
Send cards for Jesus,
Sing songs to Jesus,
Dance for Jesus,
Have a feast for Jesus,
Getting the idea yet?
Do it ALL for Him.

  Oh what great love Jesus bestowed upon us! I erect a plinth in my life. The plinth is simply, "Do all things thru Christ who strengthens me", including Christmas. Upon this plinth, I ask God to erect a man who loves God back and communes with Jesus continually. 

  Join me in a prayer.

  Wonderful Counselor, Almighty God,
  I ask you to fill me with your peace and joy. I give gifts, cards and love to others as an expression of your great gift to me. Help me to place you at the center of Christmas. Renew my love for the festivities and bind my heart with gratitude this Christmas. Thank you Lord for your precious gift.  In Jesus name, amen.  

 

"Velveted paws"

  I am currently reading The Chronicles of Narnia again. This will be my second time thru them. Actually, it will be my third, seeing as my momma read them to me as a child.

  Let me say, my momma gave me a tremendous gift by reading them to me as a child. I remember being so frightened of Tumnus and wondering if Lucy was being dumb by going with him. Do you suppose me mom saw my fear? She opened up my mind and sent me on a journey. When I read the series today I marvel at how quickly the story develops. As a child, the story was much longer. Or maybe my mom took her time reading the story, cherishing every moment. Thank you mom!

  In the first book, "The Lion, The Witch and The Wardrobe", Lucy describes something wonderful about Aslan. She observes that Aslan's paws were huge and that he "velveted them".  

  I caught the imagery straight away. I could just picture those massive paws being soft, yet dangerous. Speaking about Aslan, Mr. Beaver observed that Aslan isn't safe but he is good. If Aslan had extended his claws, he could have ripped apart those around him. 

  This speaks volumes about our God. His touch is gentle as well as terrifyingly strong. He keeps His claws in when dealing with friends. Watch out if you are an enemy!

  Our God is not like a kitten that accidently extends their claws all the time. God doesn't sharpen His claws on our furniture or drapes.

  Many people have attempted to de-claw our Lord. They are terrified of judgement and attempt to satisfy their fears by imagining that there is no god or that god does not judge sin. 

  Or, perhaps they think that God is all love. They can see His velvet touch on His friends and assume He touches everyone that way.

  Dear reader, please understand, God is both. He is loving, yet terrible. Gentle and strong. My prayer is that you find His gift so that you can avoid those claws. They are frightening!

  Thank you Lord for showing me your salvation. Thank you for paying my penalty. The price you paid was extreem. It would have taken me forever to pay for my sin, just like the Bible said.

  Velvet paws. Thank God for velveted paws.  

A "changing" phone call

  My former pastor used to speak about life changing events. He would explain that, at any moment, a phone call could come in and the rest of your life would be different. These past seventeen months have been one phone call after another.

  Truth be told, I didn't really understand what he was talking about at the time. I couldn't grasp how life changing a few moments could be.

  I had such a phone call again, about two hours ago. A huge, thick, fog decended on my mind.

  I won't share what the phone call was about. Rather, I will try and walk thru the emotions in this blog. Perhaps ending with some hope. Ready?

  For a few minutes I was in shock. The feelings of running away came back real fast. The desire to freak out was overwhelming. Using the advice given to me, I began making phone calls.

   At last, someone answered. I explained the developments and listened to their concerns and insights. It really helps just talking it out. When the conversation ended, I began to see a little clearer. The fog was giving way to brilliant rays of light. I dwelt there a little longer and moved on.

  I am expecting a phone call with more clarification tomorrow. That also contributes to my frustration. I can add so much drama to a situation, when I get to invent details.

  I poured myself a bowl of cereal. A lifeless bowl of high fiber and low taste. (why is it those type cereals seem interesting now?)  I am getting old. Wiser? Nope, just older.

  Anyways, I went to pray over the meal. Then it struck me upside my thick brain, why didn't I go to God first? Into my prayer closet I went. I explained the situation to God and gave Him complete reign over the outcomes.

  Folks, this is not normal behavior for me. I was control. I want answers. I want security. Me me me!

  The comfort God gives is quite powerful. Right now, I am calm. My creator loves me and knows how to take care of me. Full clarity restored. The brilliance of Gods love burned off any foggy residuals that were left. Oh the warmth that is felt when you emerge from a bank of fog into full sunlight!

  Perhaps next time I should call God first.
   

Prayers for Tricia part two

  In the previous blog I questioned how to find Gods will. I have been trying on different ideas and one thing really shined thru. Let me take you back in time, give you more information, and see if you agree.

  When I arrived in Portland I had gotten fuel. When I get fuel I sometimes get my spending money (it has no extra fee when you get fuel). My amount I was to get was fifty dollars. Something said, "Get seventy five". It wasn't audible. It was a strong idea though.

  I couldn't figure out why I would need an extra twenty five bucks. I had no need for the extra money. My supplies were strong and I had a little money left over. So why the twenty five?

  After my encounter with Tricia I began to understand. She was supposed to get the twenty five. Regretfully, I didn't understand this until the next day or two.

  I repented of my hardness against The Spirits leading. I had heard people say, "God told me to give you this", but I thought they were full of mushrooms.

  Imagine if I had been able to share with Tricia about the leading? I could have told her that God had me get extra money and I didn't know why. She was why.

  Oh friends, I feel terrible! My heart sinks at my failure. I am a hard hearted cynical jerk.

  The only redeeming thing is that God doesn't rely upon me solely to accomplish his will. That is comforting. Also, I believe God can use me, or at least try to, again in the future.

  My prayer now is, "Lord, help me to be sensitive to you leading. Help me remove the blinders of selfishness and do your will".

Who would?

  I was just sitting here pondering sentence structuring. Bizarre habit? Yep! Some sentences can only be understood completely if the are in written form. Consider:

Who would Mary marry?
Who would marry Mary?

For fun:

Who would merry Mary marry?
Who would marry merry Mary?

Can you think of others? Have fun!
 

Prayers for Tricia

  I met Tricia in Tacoma a couple of days ago. I was walking into the truck stop and she asked me for a couple of dollars to help with gas. I asked her what was going on. She told me that she needed to get to Portland for a job opportunity. She said that she felt really awkward asking for money and that she was worried that truckers might think she would want to "earn" some money.

  Normally I never give people money. I sensed that I should give her some, so I gave her a fiver and wished her well. I also told her that maybe looking for wedding rings on the fingers of the truckers might be a way to help her with her fears. She showed me her wedding ring and said that she was faithful but unsure if the truckers were. Again, I wished her well and said goodbye.

  Today I am down in Portland. I had a guy ask me for money so he could mail a package. Unique approach to be sure. I told him no then thought back to Tricia. I wondered if she made it. Did I do the right thing?

  Tricia walked up about ten minutes later. She appeared to be really struggling. She said, "I know you helped me once, but things are harder now and I need help getting back to Tacoma."  I told her that I couldn't help her again.

  Tricia stayed at my truck and talked for a bit. Tricia had a prospect for a job in Portland but didn't make it soon enough. The job was given to someone else. She said she was unsure what the future holds. I swallowed my sympathy and wished her well.

  As she walked away, I began to worry for her. How could I wish her well without actually helping? Was God asking me to give her more money? How do you figure this out quickly?

  I said a fast prayer. I realised that I could not stand myself if I did not offer more help. I walked the trucks and found her. I told her, "I get asked all the time by people for money, I never give them any, I can't be sure they aren't being hurt by the money." As I handed her a ten, she truly looked amazed. We talked some more.

  She told me her story. She was taking care of an elderly lady, kind of a home nurse, and the lady passed away. She said that its tough because she is unlicensed. The elderly lady had provided her with an income as well as a place to live. Now she is potentially homeless, jobless and doesn't know what to do.

  She said that she was going to try the shelters. She is scared about those places. She had been in one years ago and was deeply troubled to go back.

  As Tricia started to talk about her former patient, she began crying and missing her. 

  Let me tell you where I am at. I know that Tricia is in a tough place. I wanted to help much more. I asked how much fuel she had. She had enough to make it back to Tacoma. I asked her name then told her I would pray for her.

  I hope Tricia is going to be ok.

  I often find that I have no idea what Gods will is, in these type circumstances. When I mentioned prayer, Tricia looked very hopeful. My prayer is that she knows God and is saved.

  I wrote this blog to remind me to pray for her. Also, I want to pray that God will give me wisdom in these circumstances and that I would faithfully share Him with others. Please join me in these prayers. 

Front beer

  Here is a glimpse into insanity. A relative of mine used to go a buy a six pack of beer and it would last him days or even weeks. Crazy huh?!

  Ok, that's not really the crazy part, this is. I thought he drank like I did, as much as you can as often as you can. I figured that he had found a way how not to show it to others. See, I thought, he would buy a six pack and put it in the fridge and use it to hide his true drinking. Put the alcohol you drink elsewhere and put a six pack of "front beer" on the shelf. Everyone would think you seldom drank! Brilliant!

  Naturally I began to discover that he really didn't drink much. The poor man suffered from a condition of not truly enjoying alcohol to all its glorious potential. Thinking about drinking a beer or two and being like, "Whoa, I think I can feel something, I better stop!"  What a miserable way to drink! The feeling IS the fun!

  Well, I never figured out how to "front" my booze. The stuff was magical, it always vanished. Imagine my horror to discover that normal people don't enjoy blasting brain cells all the time. It was not an act of will power that kept them from drinking like I did, they were just wired funny. My wiring doesn't allow for casual drinking, its all or nothing. I chose nothing. 

  Now I just have to figure out how people put a snack food "front" up.

Dreams part two

  Ever consider the humanity of Christ? You know the stuff: Him being a baby. Was he a good teenager? Were his teeth perfect and straight? Were his baby teeth "wisdom teeth" (there's a joke in there I am sure).

  I got to thinking about my dreams and wondered what Christ's dreams may have been like. My mind is busy figuring things out, he had them all figured out. In my dreams I could do all sorts of amazing things, Jesus was amazing.

  Anyways, I just got to pondering about Jesus and if he ever dreamed in his sleep.

The Tract

  I awoke today and went into the truck stop to wash my face and prepare for the day. When I arrived back at the truck there was a gospel tract in the door handle. I don't know when it was placed there cause I don't use the handle to shut the door.

  The tract was a Chick Tract called, "This was your life". The tract was from a baptist chuch in MO, Missouri right? That tract travelled a long ways to find my door!

  I have only been given a tract once in my life, in person I mean. It was at the Orange Show fairgrounds in San Bernardino, Ca. The guy treated me to a good dose of distain because I was going to the fair. I had told the guy that I was a christian (I wasn't) and he acted like going to the fair was an indication that I was lost. But he tried.

  That is my point, trying. How is it that I could live for 38 years in this country and only have been given one tract in person?

  I know that some places get lots of exposure to tracts. Many people grow weary of having to deal with pushy christian salesmen. I understand.

  However, it is a good thing, as a christian, to have a tract or some sort of literature at the ready to be able to give to someone. The opportunity to hand them to someone seems to just happen sometimes. Regretfully, I have not always been prepared for this eventuality.

  One more side note here. Seat belts fastened and trays in the upright and locked position.

  In Acts chapter three we see Peter and John strolling into the temple. A crippled beggar asked of them an alms. "Alms for the poor, Alms for the poor". Anyways, the apostles were like, "Hey dude, we be broke but here is a healing from Jesus". They offered something the guy needed. He needed money but with health he could get money. Dude healed, problem solved. He knew it was from Jesus and testified as such.

  Here's the thing, we sometimes encounter a beggar and think, "Now here's a fellow who really needs this tract and will be an easy target". Notice the problem? You judged this guy as needing Christ more than others. Also, you likely didn't meet his physical need and rather switched to spiritual without regard to the physical need. If (and this is a huge IF) your concern for this person was placed on you by God, then take the time to meet the need. Money can be dangerous but a burger always delights.    

  Am I clear enough? The beggar is not likely to care about what you say if you don't care about where they are at. Imagine Peter and John handing the cripple a tract and moving on. Would that have been recorded in Gods word? Not likely. Sure we see a miracle performed, but we also see compassion.

  The Holy Spirit can lead us in those type of situations. We encounter beggars all the time, at least I do. If I gave them all even a small amount of money, I would go broke. If I throw Jesus into the equation, suddenly it all works. He will direct me to the ones I can help. Sincerity is the key.

  As I have heard said, "We are all just beggars showing each other where to find The Bread".

Dreams

  I had a dream! Ok, not the exact beginning of a memorable speech, but I did have an unusual one.

  I was thinking, before I went to sleep, what I would say if a judge asked me "Why do you deserve leniency?"  I really struggled with that thought. If I was guilty then I would not "deserve" leniency. Being guilty would make me deserve the penalty.

  My speech would likely include how unworthy of leniency I would be. I, being undeserving, nevertheless would be requesting grace and not justice.

  Justice before God hinges on what someone else has done. If the penalty was paid, as in Jesus, then I would have wanted to strike a deal before court to have Him pay the penalty. This is called, making terms of peace with the judge and the law by the payment of Christ.

  A criminal trial on earth is another matter entirely. Our system does not accomidate another person paying the penalty. We have pardons and commutations, but those are granted without someone actually paying the price.

  So, as a criminal, what would I say if asked "Why do you deserve leniency?"

  Evidently it haunted my dreams. I was placed in the courtroom many times (I kept waking up). Each time I was silent. What could I say? Do you have an answer?

Observation?

  I am trying to be a more observant person. I am somewhat envious of people who have this trait. It seems to me that observant people have a better grasp on life.

  This "grasp on life" doesn't mean that the people are somehow more grounded. I just feel that they enjoy a deeper understanding of things.

  Let me illustrate:

  For the last year and couple months I have let my hair grow out. Its quite long now and that created issues that I was not prepared to face.

  One such issue is washing the hair. I used to be able to scrub my short hair vigorously with my fingers, so much so, even my scalp would get scrubbed. Now if I do this, my hair gets tangled (Uggh).

  Solution! Wet hair, apply soap, brush soap thru hair with hairbrush! Works great with conditioner also.

  What does this have to do with being observant? Heck if I know. I couldn't figure a better lead in to talking about my personal grooming habits.

  Next week on Grooming with Josh: tweezing