Suppose a man has a problem with lust. Where can this man find help. Does the church offer any help? Are there men he could call out to? Would they hate him more than he hates himself.
He feels alone and trapped. He tries to comfort himself by thinking he is ok and that all men struggle with lust. He wants to be set free, yet he continues sinning, not knowing there is a solution. He has a low grade sexual fever or perhaps even a full blown sexual flu.
Could God lead him to call on you? If he did what could you say? Would you just confuse him more by giving him platitudes he doesn't understand? Do you have hope you can share in a practical way? Has God shown you how to win a battle you thought couldn't be won? Would you show him?
I am that man with spiritual sickness. Here is some of my story. This sucks to do, but here goes.
Everywhere I went my eyes continually focused on feeding lust. In my mind, I mentally undressed many woman I found attractive. By continuing this for many years, I had honed my eyes and mind into lustful weapons.
After becoming saved, I was told that I must no longer lust. I glanced around to see if there was any man who had won this battle. I found many men who quoted scripture. I even found men who condemned and judged men who were in this sin. I never found one that could help lead me out of it. I continued in sin.
Where could I find the help I needed?
Hey, maybe my friends could help! My friends, in fact, still practiced lust. We never spoke about lust being bad, or if we did, it was more like winking at it. Strike one!
Hmm, maybe a "Godly" man could help. Did my pastor ever have a struggle with sexual purity? How should I know! He never said a word if he did. Strike two!
Oh, but wait, there is my dad. Surely he could come thru with some sage advice on victory over sexual sin. I wouldn't know it if he did. We also never talked about it. Strike three, you are outta there!
Wait! Wait! Wait! Hold it right there! "Foul ball", I hear! "Really, no man ever talked about his victory over sexual sin?" Sorry guys! If you won the battle, you never spoke to me about it.
Oh sure, you belted out words about sin and judgement, but did you share your story? Ya know, the story of hiding porn. Or wishing that cute lady in the office would flirt a bit. Or the other lady who did flirt a bit. Did the flirting go to far? Were you hoping it would go further?
What about sex with your wife? No, I am not talking about details here. Did keeping your mind and eyes pure make your sex life better with your bride? Beyond anything you could dream up? I want to know why sex is more awesome in a Godly marriage. Did your pure eyes make your desire grow for your bride?
"Whoa there you little puke! How dare you bring this stuff up. Sex is dirty! You should not speak of such things. Its not right! Get over it!", said the man embarassed about sex.
It stinks to think of all those wasted years. I never knew there was a way out. Honestly, I didn't know I wanted out. I thought more lust meant better sex.
I want my eyes and mind to be pure. I want to desire my wife. I want to be ravished by her beauty. I want her to know that I only have eyes for her. I want her to worry that if she gets a little flirty or shows a little skin, I might attack her!
If my desire for my wife wouldn't grow, why would I want to stop lusting? Lust stole that desire away. I wanted it back!
Some well intentioned guy would say something stupid like, "Why would I go out for a hamburger, when I have steak at home?"
What's a man, struggling with lust, supposed to think of that statement? I know what I thought. I thought they were retarded at best.
Was an explanation given as to why his wife was steak while strange women offered only hamburger? Nope. Seriously, not once! I couldn't figure it out. It was just another example of something I couldn't understand. Did I ask? Nope. Too embarassing.
I have gotten the answers now. The answers didn't come from any man I have met in person. They came from other Godly men writing about lust. It came from men writing about why sex is more awesome once they got delivered from lust. It came from those mens testimonies. They spoke of the terror of sin. They also spoke of the rewards of living holy. Yep, they told why the steak was so good. Now hamburger doesn't hold sway over their thoughts, but that steak sure does!
I don't want to minimize what God can do. He can lift a person right out of sin and deliver instantly. Or, he can give the tools to start working on the problem and we recover more slowly.
I wasn't delivered instantly. I thought everyone else had been. God has helped men, who in turn have helped me, win this battle.
It takes a special courage to talk about struggles. It takes the same courage to talk about victories. This is a taboo subject for lots of guys and many guys want to never discuss it.
In order for men to grow in the Lord its time for men who serve the Lord to open up. Stop hiding. You haven't always served God the way you should. Stop pretending you have. What happened? Were you scared and lonely? Did you do things you wish you could hide forever? How did you win the battle? Was it difficult? Was there someone to help?
What about the Psalms of David. All of them. He bore his heart out in those Psalms. All our lives we can look in the Psalms and read about his failures and victories. He laid it all out. I weep for what he did and the victories in his life. What a man!
I know God has given me freedom from lust. Without him it would never have been possible. He alone should be given all the glory for this victory.
I want to make it clear that I won't win if I trust in men. Men can only show me how they did it. If God has given them a victory and they share it, I will gain even more understanding about how I can have victory as well. If I guard my eyes and heart, daily, God will continue granting me this victory.
No comments:
Post a Comment